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Por Marionicia |

In my experience, regarding contacting relatives, there are some issues to consider.

Personaly is been sweet-sour cause it is a joy to see the faces of those I long to see, ´cause at last a name from the past has a face in the present, it is an intimate joy that maybe those persons take for "a curiosity not so clear".

I had contact some primos by phone, some of them looking also into genealogy, then I feel troubled cause there are no more stuff to share; and if meeting personaly there are no common interests.

Then if contacted by mail it is euforic and enthusiastic, but when by phone it sounds tensionated.

I feel like I have to stablish a relationship, and knowing myself that is not precisely what I want, in most cases.

There we have an issue. One has to be concious first about the object of interest, data or relationship or both? And then
to have a good plan for those we are meeting to fully understand what are we looking for and what are we doing with the data we ask for,

A person could not accept that an "unknown" one is asking for names, places and dates, and is not writing a book.

Is it a community feeling or am I alone in the corner?

What would be a good plan to be wellcome by a recently contacted relative?

Greetings.

Santos Luna escribió:
Hello Leticia: Your message below is great....very touching.

I have an aunt, my mother's half sister living in Tijuana...she acted like I was doing something horrible with my Genealogy research.

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All I can share is this: I was not raised by either side of my family
members.

So, when it came to the point of meeting both sides, I was amazed that I
looked like one side of the family, but had definite personality traits of the
other side.

Data helps...in my case, I can get a hint in small details that were
documented.

For example, my great grandmother was the only person in her town that
proudly (I am assuming) refuted Catholism. It is documented in the census. What
is this attributed to? Well, I have contacted family members, and each one
give their perspective.

What is reality? I will never know. But it does occur to me that the recent
"discovery" of Judaism in our family may have something to do with her
outward thwarting of what was considered the "norm". And then again, maybe the
family members oral historical recollection is "real". Who knows? The truth
may lie between having found a Torah imbedded within adobe walls, and the
legacy of our indigenous heritage, and our conquered heritage inherited by Spain.
After all, we are a people that were conquered and conquerors. Perspective
details truth....which continues to reveal itself to us.

All I can share with you is this: when I met this side of the family, I felt
a sense of "homecoming". I was one in union with them, even though we had
not grown up together. Such a feeling from my mother's side of the family was
never felt. Perhaps because I look so much like them, but my spirit turned
out to be like my father's side.

Nevertheless, it has been my experience that both sides welcome me with open
arms.....it is as if they are able to "see" something I can't. The Jewish
people have a name for it.....as a matter of fact, all do......it ranges from
"familia" to unknown words that have been lost to our culture.....

On the "flip" side, I have also experienced the wariness of those that have
been marginalized....they are understandably reluctant of "outsiders"....as we
are considered as such when not having been part of their "immediate"
reality.

How do we compensate for all of this? I don't know, except that we must
continue inm our quest for documentation....

Esperanza
Chicagoland area

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I believe it is because you are not brought up the same way.
My expierence with the only family I have found is with a Prima. She still has contact with the family of my grandmother, I on the other hand have no contact with anyone except my brother and sister. Ties were broken when my mother married.
This Prima asked me many questions which I answered and even sent old fotographs she had never seen, but never answered my questions and stopped writing me when she saw I knew nothing.
But this did not take away my desire to Discover. So I agree with Esperanza we must continue with our quest, theres a reason we feel this nesessity to know...........

Sofia
> > All I can share is this: I was not raised by either side of my family > members.> > So, when it came to the point of meeting both sides, I was amazed that I > looked like one side of the family, but had definite personality traits of the > other side.> > Data helps...in my case, I can get a hint in small details that were > documented.> > For example, my great grandmother was the only person in her town that > proudly (I am assuming) refuted Catholism. It is documented in the census. What > is this attributed to? Well, I have contacted family members, and each one > give their perspective.> > What is reality? I will never know. But it does occur to me that the recent > "discovery" of Judaism in our family may have something to do with her > outward thwarting of what was considered the "norm". And then again, maybe the > family members oral historical recollection is "real". Who knows? The truth > may lie between having found a Torah imbedded within adobe walls, and the >
legacy of our indigenous heritage, and our conquered heritage inherited by Spain. > After all, we are a people that were conquered and conquerors. Perspective > details truth....which continues to reveal itself to us.> > All I can share with you is this: when I met this side of the family, I felt > a sense of "homecoming". I was one in union with them, even though we had > not grown up together. Such a feeling from my mother's side of the family was > never felt. Perhaps because I look so much like them, but my spirit turned > out to be like my father's side.> > Nevertheless, it has been my experience that both sides welcome me with open > arms.....it is as if they are able to "see" something I can't. The Jewish > people have a name for it.....as a matter of fact, all do......it ranges from > "familia" to unknown words that have been lost to our culture.....> > On the "flip" side, I have also experienced the wariness of those that have > been marginalized....they are underst
andably reluctant of "outsiders"....as we > are considered as such when not having been part of their "immediate" > reality. > > How do we compensate for all of this? I don't know, except that we must > continue inm our quest for documentation....> > Esperanza> Chicagoland area> > > > > > **************Start the year off right. Easy ways to stay in shape. > http://body.aol.com/fitness/winter-exercise?NCID=aolcmp00300000002489> -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- > Nuestros Ranchos General Mailing List> > To post, send email to:> general(at)nuestrosranchos.org> > To change your subscription, log on to:> http://www.nuestrosranchos.org
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