Yoland Medina Perez has submitted a very very thought provoking poem. .
.go and read it:

Files-->Books and Articles-->"Poems and Cuentos"

Secrets are something that can totally alter our genealogy.

I was listening to a podcast the other day by the Genealogy Guys and
they were telling why these certain documents were in error. It seems
that the duaghter in law had made a death bed promise to keep the secret
that the mother in law was older than husband and that was why the
information on the death cert was wrong.

Secrets and previous centuries way of thinking on things are things we
really need to consider.

seems in my family certain secrets have altered the history as well. The
story goes that my grandmother, Virginia Diaz was born on December 15,
1886 some 5 days (oh what shame) before my grandfather, Julio Puentes
who was born on December 20, 1886, but I couldn't find a baptism record
for Abuelita Virginia. but low and behold there is another Virginia Diaz
baptism that was recorded on December 3, 1885. woe, Woe, WOE that would
make my grandmother a whopping 1 year and 17 days older than my
grandfather IF indeed it is Abuelita Virginia's baptism record.

So now it gets confusing. What do I believe. I'm leaning in the
direction that the 1885 record is NOT my abuelita Virginia's baptism
record AND that is solely on gut instinct with strong Oral History to
back up that instinct. The next generation will have to figure it out.

Seems that there is a lot of back and forth about their ages. Seems that
there were some letters written back and forth about how my
G-grandfather (Julio Puente, Sr DOB: April 11, 1852) was upset about my
grandfather marrying a 5 days older woman. Was it really that big of a
deal? Were Mexican men of that time really suppose to be marrying women
10 years their junior to insure plenty of time for them to be reproductive?

. . .well anyway. The story goes that my G-grandfather wasn't so much
upset by the fact that my grandfather was marrying his 3rd cousin but
that he was marrying an "older" woman. Also the story goes that my Great
Grandfather, Francisco Diaz (DOB: April 2, 1862) would tell my
grandmother over and over again that if she didn't remember anything or
learn anything she needed to remember the day of her birth: December 15,
1886. My Aunt who recently passed, Julia Puentes de Espinoza was told
that story about the repeating of her birth over again several times to
make the point stick.

Now we have the story of my Great Grandmother Antonia SantaMaria (DOB:
June 11, 1862) in "Muchacha" (which is also in the Poems and Cuentos).
She had a child that was born before my grandmother who died when my
grandmother was just born. That 1885 record could easily be for this
first child and that other child easily could have been Virginia1 and
then my grandmother named the same to replace the dead child. I've seen
multiple same name namings like that even when the child didn't die.

So what was it? Was all of it an elaborate story to cover up the horrid
and unbearable fact that my grandmother was 1 year and 17 days older
than my grandfather? or was there another child born before that was
Virginia1 and my grandmother really was renamed to take her place?

I don't know and don't believe I'll ever know for sure, but I do know
that I "believe" that my Abuelita Virginia was born on December 15, 1886
and the next generation of researchers will need to sort things out.

It is an interesting story and gives some insight into the way our
people our relatives thought back in their time. This way of thinking is
directly influential into the way we think now because they were the
ones that directly influenced our parents. Thank you Yolanda for your
poem that provoked these thoughts. Imagine all the other secrets that
our relatives have taken with them to their graves. How I also would
love to sit at their feet and hear the stories.

joseph